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DRUGSTEP: christian parents worried about teenage son "have you been smoking dubstep?" "mom what??" "DON'T LIE TO ME WHERE'S THE SKRILLEX"                   HIGH TIMES: teens smoke weed after school "dude... sinks are like showers but for your hands" *passes joint* ..bro that's fucking adorable                   PRUDE: teen admits he has never kissed a girl "dude how? you're 18" "cause i only kiss women...like YOUR MOM" "YOU GOT ME AGAIN BRO!" *bro5*                   GAMECUBE: teens gear up for Super Smash Brothers Melee "i'm green falco" "i'm normal falco" "i'm red falco" "i'm ice climbers" "...fag"                   SENSUAL: teen sets up for a perfect date "candle lit dinner, bottle of red wine, and a copy of spy kids on blu ray" *gets 100 blowjobs*                   FISH ARE FRIENDS: a white girl posts a facebook status Becky: i'm FINna watch some shark week! Hannah: omg so creative! Becky: love uuuuuuu                   TEEN TALK: "is the double condom method more effective?" "a condom inside a condom? that's like inception dude" "...more like CONTRACEPTION"                   UNEMPLOYED: teen gets turned down at local super market for putting "rolls hella dope blunts" on his resume "how is that not a good skill??"                   SCIENTIFIC: studies indicate that 3 out of every 4 teens smoke marijuana. Coincidentally, scientists also found that 1 in 4 teens are nerds                   COLLEGE: teen takes Adderall to help his grades "i'm gunna crush this test yo" *next day* "wait, you have to STUDY also??" *fails hard*                   TEEN TALK: "is the double condom method more effective?" "a condom inside a condom? that's like inception dude" "...more like CONTRACEPTION"                   GRADES: Student receives an "F" on powerpoint presentation for using too many laser sounds in transitions "that sound effect is gangster af"                   FAMILY DINNER: "mom what are we eating?" "we're having pasta" *mom puts on dubstep* "with a side of TURNIP" *everyone goes fucking nuts*                   TRAGIC: teen reportedly "never seen again" after entering a Hot Topic "we begged him not to enter that store" "he belongs to the mall now"                   TEEN TALK: "is the double condom method more effective?" "a condom inside a condom? that's like inception dude" "...more like CONTRACEPTION"                   FANDANGO: 16 year olds try to see an R rated movie "i left my ID in-" *fake moustache falls off* "damnit" *sees grown ups 2*                   MIA: "mom i lost my swag!" "where did you last YOLO?" "i already checked my snapback collection!" "well i'm sure it'll TURN UP"                   GAME: teen joins a sports team in hopes of getting girls "sup ladies, i'm the quarterman for our school's hoopball squad" *has infinity sex*                   KILLER KUSH: teens get high "bro i think i'm dead" "ur just freaking out" "i'm srs" *turns into ghost* "damn, that kush was dank" *hi fives*

NEW SCHOOL COOL: college teens party with a millennial "you guys got any beer?" *sniffs a line of pure dogecoin* "GUYS GRANDPA WANTS TO CARBO-LOAD"

NEW BRUNSWICK, NJ - It was a sight to behold when college teens at Riverdale University invited a millennial to one of their notorious shindigs this past weekend.

dogecoin party

Just when you thought Riverdale had seen it all, the evening unfolded with the millennial (or "Grandpa," as he was affectionately dubbed) snorting a line of what he believed to be pure Dogecoin. Yes, you read that right.

It all started innocently enough when the millennial, a somewhat out-of-place 38-year-old named Chad, entered the scene. "You guys got any beer?" he asked the room full of puzzled Gen Zs who were busy sipping on hard seltzers and microbrewed kombuchas. His innocent question was met with stifled laughter and incredulous looks.

Chad, undeterred by the bewildering beverages, shifted his focus to a suspicious-looking baggie on the counter. "This is some pure Dogecoin right?" He asked, hoping to fit in with the crypto-obsessed youngsters. Before anyone could stop him, Chad bent over and sniffed a line of what was actually crushed-up chalk meant for a game of billiards later that night.

As the chalk dust wafted through the air, the room erupted in laughter. Chad's attempt to fit in had turned into a moment of comedic gold. One student even managed to capture the whole thing on TikTok, and the video has since garnered over a million views, quickly becoming the talk of Riverdale University.

"GUYS, GRANDPA WANTS TO CARBO-LOAD," someone shouted from the back of the room, only to be drowned out by the laughter of his peers. As the laughter subsided, the teens decided to make the most of their unexpected guest. In an act of intergenerational camaraderie, they sat Chad down for a marathon viewing of their favorite anime shows, a foreign concept to him but one that he embraced with open arms.

In the end, despite the dogecoin snorting and craft beer confusion, the party became a bridge between two very different generations. Chad might not have understood the appeal of anime or non-alcoholic beer, but he surely had a night to remember. As for the Riverdale students, they learned a valuable lesson - never leave your billiard chalk unattended at a party.