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FUNDONT: Teen hospitalized after tragic fondue accident "i thought the bitches would want this warm cheesy dick" "they didnt"                   JOB: teen gets interviewed "why should we hire you?" "i have 1000 followers on twitter" "how many do you follow?" "...1200" "GET OUTTA HERE"                   TRILL SMITH: teen claims to be "too trill for homework" "you think ima need to know algebra when i'm a famous rapper?" "bitch swerve"                   LANDLOCKED: Nebraska teens think about the beach "what do you think the ocean is like?" "it's probably hella gay" "i don't even like salt"                   LANDLOCKED: Nebraska teens think about the beach "what do you think the ocean is like?" "it's probably hella gay" "i don't even like salt"                   CHILLIN: teens kick it! "i'm bored" wanna like, go outside? "out ..side?" *squints eyes and stares teen down* just fuckin witchu *rips bong*                   DRIVE THRU: teens smoke and go to Taco Bell "can i have a taco? HELLO??" dude you gotta lower the window "this is too complicated" *leaves*                   WONDERWALL: : teen learns guitar to pick up girls *strums a single G chord* "i'm gunna get so fucking laid"                   EARLY BIRD: teen gets woken up "why would you wake me up at such an UNGODLY HOUR??" dude it's 10:30 "JESUS CHRIST ITS PRACTICALLY YESTERDAY"                   YUMMY: teen "hecka ticked off" after mother packs him "oatmeal raisin granola bars" for lunch "BITCH KNOWS I ONLY FUCKS WIT CHOCOLATE CHIP"                   FASHION: as camouflage becomes more fashionable, teens become harder and harder to spot "shit where did Tim go?" "lol i'm right here dude!"                   SWAGGER: teen gets ready for saturday night yeah this snapback yolo combo will for sure get me laid *chugs diet pepsi* TURN DOWN FOR WHAT?                   KILLER KUSH: teens get high "bro i think i'm dead" "ur just freaking out" "i'm srs" *turns into ghost* "damn, that kush was dank" *hi fives*                   DUB: young teen gets his "ass whooped" after he allegedly tried to pay for a gram of marijuana in Trident Layers™                   FASHION: as camouflage becomes more fashionable, teens become harder and harder to spot "shit where did Tim go?" "lol i'm right here dude!"                   BRAWL: teen loses fight to local bully "i don't get it. i watched the whole 1st season of dragon ball z" "i should have destroyed him"                   NOSTALGIA: HS freshmen have a "remember the 90's" night "this is gunna be so rad!!" *they sit around and watch Max Keeble's Big Move (2001)*                   NOSTALGIA: HS sophomores reminisce about simpler times "remember the 90's?" "not at all"                   WHITE GIRL: teen asked what 5 things she would bring to a deserted island 1. uggs 2. iPhone 3. iPhone charger 4. starbucks giftcard 5. my bf

FIVE EASY FATHER'S DAY GIFTS


Damn, wasn't it just Mother's Day like two minutes ago? Whatever, we at teen news know damn well you haven't bought anything yet, so we've personally partnered with Amazon's Jeff Bezos and his drones to deliver whatever useless shit your dad doesn't want this year.





5) Magazines - Shop Amazon - Father's Day Sale: Up to 83% Off on Top Men's Magazines

For the people who have fathers with a fetish for the experience of waiting in doctor's offices.






4) Gift Cards - Shop Amazon - Father's Day Gift Cards - Free Gift Box and One-Day Shipping

Well, if you have any siblings you can definitely rank up in terms of "kid most likely to be sacrificed to some pagan god" by getting your Dad a gift card.  Some people are into that though, so, I mean, it's something.





3) Electronics - Shop Amazon - Electronics Father's Day Gift Guide

Keep in mind your dad was born when Rock N Roll could actually get you laid and iPhones didn't even exist.  Electronics aren't a bad gift, but your old man will most likely give up on figuring the thing out and you'll end up overpaying for a dusty bedroom decoration.




2) Watches - Shop Amazon - Take 25% Off - Father's Day Watch Savings

Great idea guy! Let's get the oldest dude I know a device that let's him known just how much fucking older he's getting by the second.



1) Car Supplies - Shop Amazon - Save Up to 45% on Automotive Gifts for Dad

Cars are the ultimate method of transportation for dads.  They take them to Home Depot and back on the reg.  Go ahead and buy your dad some bullshit car supplies.