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NOSTALGIA: HS sophomores reminisce about simpler times "remember the 90's?" "not at all"                   LEGIT: teen gets real "i'm all about three things: pussy, weed, and kill streaks" *rips bong and plays black ops* "...the pussy can wait"                   FLIRT: teens interact sexually "is that an iPhone in your pants or are you just happy to see me?" "it's a Samsung Galaxy you stupid bitch"                   WOAH: teen makes friends at new school "sup guys, my name's chad and i think beer is cool" *gets invited to every party in a 20 mile radius*                   BROAH: teens "out bro" each other "sup bro?" "sup bromo sapien?" "sup tony bromo?" "sup BROSEIDON, KING OF THE BROCEAN, SLAYER OF MERM POON"                   GAME: teen joins a sports team in hopes of getting girls "sup ladies, i'm the quarterman for our school's hoopball squad" *has infinity sex*                   OCTOBER: teens go on a haunted hayride *throws hay onto females* "HAY GIRL" *throws more hay* "i said...HAY GIRL" "hayyyy!" *gets laid*                   TRILL SMITH: teen claims to be "too trill for homework" "you think ima need to know algebra when i'm a famous rapper?" "bitch swerve"                   FLAMER: teen boy's house burns down due to his scented candle collection. Firefighters comment "it's the gayest tradegy i've seen in years"                   SMOOTH: teen uses a classic pickup line "you like marijuana?" ummm, yeah! "marijuwanna suck my dick?" *gets laid so hard*                   PUTT PUTT: teen has trouble on his first date w/ female "she beat me in mini golf" that's rough, what did you do? "i left her there" nice                   DUNKIN BRONUTS: teens get coffee "why iced coffee bro" "i like my coffee like i like my bros...chill AS FUCK" *chugs coffee while bro5ing*                   MAIL: teen writes love letter to gf babe, ilu more then weed. well, u nd weed r prolly bout equal bc i luv weed alot but still love, steve                   HOT: teens love sexting! 9:14 - i wanna sex u up 9:15 - wat u gna do 2 me? 9:15 - ima stick my penis in ur *goes on wikipedia* 9:24 - labia                   PUTT PUTT: teen has trouble on his first date w/ female "she beat me in mini golf" that's rough, what did you do? "i left her there" nice                   TRIPPY: teens drop acid for the first time "grasshoppers are the dubstep of nature" "holy shit bro that's so deep" "i'm a young socrates"                   MIA: "mom i lost my swag!" "where did you last YOLO?" "i already checked my snapback collection!" "well i'm sure it'll TURN UP"                   BALLING: Teen takes girlfriend out to dinner "ight babe were gonna split the 60 pc nugget" "a milkshake? idk babe maybe next time"                   RIPPED: teens claim to have smoked that celebrity kush "i'm emma stoned" "i'm baked shelton" "i can't think of one...but i'm high af"

SIX REASONS YOU SHOULD START SMOKING CIGS


In High School you will undoubtedly one day get the chance to attend one of the 'cool kids' parties (unless your a super beta nerd in which case you should just stop reading this post) and now is your time to shine! You're going to want to showoff and prove to them that you are indeed a social elite at heart, and there's no better way to impress a bunch of attractive jocks than by ripping a cig. Think about how badass and adult you will seem to them by smoking something your little high school lungs aren't even legally old enough to inhale! Well if thats not enough to convince you to start hitting the cancer stick than hopefully this list will, I present to you six reasons YOU should start smoking cigs.


1) Its Fricking Sweet


Like look how fucking cool it looks when a cigarette burns, don't you wanna take part in this awesome lifestyle choice?

2) You Will Gain Infinite Amounts of Swag


In the famous words of Mr. Rogers "If it wasn't for cigarettes I never woulda landed my god damn T.V. Show" and look at the cool dancing powers he gained because of it! Don't you want to have your own children's TV show and millions of bitches on your dick? If so follow in the footsteps of Mr. Rogers and start smoking today!

3) You'll Start Losing Weight


No matter how skinny you are, it never hurt anyone to shed a couple extra pounds, and since smoking cigs curves your appetite you'll achieve just that once you start smoking. So unless you wanna look like Honey BooBoo when you grow up I suggest you run to your nearest 7/11 and purchase a pack of New Ports today.

4) It's Sexy...AF


This one is pretty simple, if you wanna be sexy and seductive like Lana Del Rey, then purchase a pack and some matches today, put a cig in your mouth and stop being Lana Del GAY.

5) You'll Become a Total BAMF


Everyone knows that ladies love a badass, and there's no easier way to gain some extra badass points than by ripping a cancer stick. All you gotta do is put a cigarette to your lips, light it, exhale and watch the women flock to you like magnet attracted to how hardcore you are. 

6) You'll Stop Looking like This at Parties


Chances are if you somehow managed to get an invite to a party before smoking cigs, when you hit the dance floor your moves resemble someone giving felatio. So replace that invisible dick in your mouth with a cigarette and you'll be well on your way to losing that virginity!