| BALTIMORE, MD - Principal Jon Stinson reading the morning announcements a few days ago "[expletive] you teens, spreading this [expletive] holiday cheer, you know [expletive] what you [indiscernible expletives] are no longer allowed to say happy holidays either because it's [a lot of expletives] offensive to me." After an extremely intense minute of silence and confusion the principal added "This has nothing to do with the [expletive] rumor that Mr. Diver is screwing my wife." We sat down for a 1 on 1 interview with a student of the high school. "How'd you feel about the expletives your principal used?" "They were mostly fucks or variations of fucks." "I mean, the fact that your principal used them." "Oh...it was kinda badass actually."
Mr. Diver, a gym teacher, was unavailable for comment because he was presumably "fucking the shit out of Mrs. Stinson" A notoriously liberal sophomore student who identifies as a precautionary transgender bisexual and prefers the personal pronoun "it" had a lot to say. "Honestly the HH phrase is offensive", LeSean Stevenson is referring to "Happy Holidays", "some people aren't emotionally inclined to feel happy or to celebrate events. Who are we to enforce feelings of happiness on everyone? I don't want to exaggerate, but this seems mighty similar to Hitler to me."
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Is the phrase "Happy Holidays" reminiscent of the Nazi regime? Whether or not you simply want to stand out, have a cheating ho ho ho of a wife, or just simply hate having fun I think we can learn a lesson from Martin Luther King Jr. High School and let "Happy Holidays" slide. | |||||
