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SCIENCE PROJECT: "as you can see, the air flows through the water bec-" THIS IS A BONG "it's called a water pipe" GET OUT OF MY CLASSROOM                   YOU GIVE BUD A BAD NAME: teen gets creative "i named my piece Bong Jovi" dude that's sick *rips bong so dang hard* "WE'RE HALFWAY THEREEE OH                   ONLY 90s KIDS: teen tries new pickup lines "damn girl you give me goosebumps cause you are R.L. Fine af" "turn to page 69 if you wanna bang"                   RIPPED: teens claim to have smoked that celebrity kush "i'm emma stoned" "i'm baked shelton" "i can't think of one...but i'm high af"                   CHECK UP: teen vists doctor "so are you sexually active?" no "any drugs or alcohol?" nope "i see. well my prognosis is you're a fuckin nerd"                   BONDING: teen doesn't want to go to school "dad, it's just real fcking gay" "honestly son, you have a point" *father rolls fat ass blunt*                   BONDING: teen doesn't want to go to school "dad, it's just real fcking gay" "honestly son, you have a point" *father rolls fat ass blunt*                   FML: teen struggles to get by in a harsh world "my chips are so crunchy that i can't hear the tv when i eat them" "i fucking hate my life"                   BALLING: Teen takes girlfriend out to dinner "ight babe were gonna split the 60 pc nugget" "a milkshake? idk babe maybe next time"                   SCIENTIFIC: studies indicate that 3 out of every 4 teens smoke marijuana. Coincidentally, scientists also found that 1 in 4 teens are nerds                   GAME: teen joins a sports team in hopes of getting girls "sup ladies, i'm the quarterman for our school's hoopball squad" *has infinity sex*                   BAD HAIR DAY: Teen girl decides to leave school after realizing her hair is "disgusting" an eyewitness stated "i'd still fuck her"                   FLIRT: teens interact sexually "is that an iPhone in your pants or are you just happy to see me?" "it's a Samsung Galaxy you stupid bitch"                   POT: teen claims to be experiencing marijuana withdrawal "the room...it's so cold" bro u smoked for the first time yesterday "U DONT KNO ME"                   GAME: teen joins a sports team in hopes of getting girls "sup ladies, i'm the quarterman for our school's hoopball squad" *has infinity sex*                   POOETRY: Teen fed up w/ eng class "do u love rap music? then class you'll love Edgar Allen Poe" "MORE LIKE EDGAR ALLEN POOP" "grow up steve"                   FISH ARE FRIENDS: a white girl posts a facebook status Becky: i'm FINna watch some shark week! Hannah: omg so creative! Becky: love uuuuuuu                   NOSTALGIA: HS sophomores reminisce about simpler times "remember the 90's?" "not at all"                   420: teens smoke after school "dude, do you ever think like, what if you were a chick? like what if- "WHAT IF YOU PASSED THE FUCKING BLUNT?"

5 EASY SKATEBOARD TRICKS TO IMPRESS BASIC BITCHES

It’s every girls dream to hook up with a sweaty skater bra, none of that gay ass longboard shit. Take note of this list if you want to finally lose your virginity while getting mad street cred along the way.


5. The Ollie

“OMG did the board just go...in the AIR?!?”
Some skaters say the ollie is the foreground for any skateboard trick ever, others dedicate their entire skate careers to perfecting this incredibly rad trick. Regardless, after poppin’ a couple of these you’ll be sure to be poppin’ cherries all over town.



*ollies right into threeway*


4. The 180

Shieeet son you barely need to ollie to nail this one. Its called the 180 because after having this trick in your arsenal all the bitches that curved you previously will be turnin’ 180 degrees just to come and suck on your dick.

some geometry may be involved


3. The Pop-Shuv

Holy shit bro you are moving up. This trick is a sure fire way to get the 4th grade scooter kids out of your way while ensuring to fuck their moms at pick up time (around 4:30, 5-oclock tops)




straight bolts son



2. No-Comply

“Are your feet liek supposed to touch the...ground?” YEAH BITCH WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT SKATEBOARDING? This trick looks extremely difficult and complicated, but in all actuality...it isn’t. The ladies won’t be able to comprehend your swag after learning this killer move.


virtual reality

1. Kickflip


You’re in the big leagues now kid. If you don’t already know this one involves the board doing a damn corkscrew under your feet. If you don’t think that’s the gnarliest shit you ever seen then get the fuck out of my face.  You’ll be kickfliping all the way to the abortion clinic after the honeys catch a glimpse of you even attempting this trick.


this grandpa is getting wayy more pussy than you