Hollywood is a culture of hacks, posers and fuckboys like Shia Lebouf. At times, it is difficult to distinguish who is real, and who is fraudulent. Alec Baldwin is a beacon of hope in that dank, humid, coke guzzling, titty augmenting city. Here are some reasons to be more like Alec Baldwin.
1. The man has slain thousands of bitches
 |
| 6/10 for Baldwin |
Alec Baldwin probably banged your grandma in the 70’s. Then he probably banged the baby sitter that was watching your dad. In fact; Alec Baldwin probably is your dad.
2. He is America’s loveable racist/homophobic grandpa.
2. He is America’s loveable racist/homophobic grandpa.
 |
| Alec don't give a fuck! |
No matter how many paparazzi he calls “faggots,” Alec Baldwin will always get work.
3. Dat flow doe.
3. Dat flow doe.
 |
| finer than yo' bitch |
4. He’s hip.
From playing words with friends on the runway, to tweeting Lindsay Lohan and provoking fellacio, his technological aptitude is impressive.
5. Did I mention he’s banged a lot of women?
Oh, to be a movie star in the 80’s. Alec Baldwin has eaten twice the amount of snatch, and tried half as hard as that pussy, Elvis.
 |
| can u spell "ima fuck your mother"? |
5. Did I mention he’s banged a lot of women?
 |
| booty so tiiight |
