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EARLY BIRD: teen gets woken up "why would you wake me up at such an UNGODLY HOUR??" dude it's 10:30 "JESUS CHRIST ITS PRACTICALLY YESTERDAY"                   ROMANCE: teen learns the power of seduction "i have alcohol, weed, and an open house. wanna come over?" *gets laid to death*                   FUN: teens prepare for Halloween "okay. i'm mario, jeff's luigi, mark's wario, and steve.. ur waluigi" why am i waluigi? "BC NO ONE LIKES U"                   WONDERWALL: : teen learns guitar to pick up girls *strums a single G chord* "i'm gunna get so fucking laid"                   TWITTER: teen faces crucial decision "i wanna rewrite my typo'd tweet but it already got three favs" "MY LIFE IS PAIN" *jumps off bridge*                   WONDERWALL: : teen learns guitar to pick up girls *strums a single G chord* "i'm gunna get so fucking laid"                   TEXTING: teens talk girls "dude she just texted me hey" ..so? "WITH TWO Y'S" *high fives so hard they break the fucking sound barrier*                   MEMORIAL DAY: teen remembers the players that died in a Call of Duty team deathmatch "R.I.P. EternalVirgin, bonglover69, and BROBROBRO1"                   OLD: teen is highly confused "dad what's that?" "its called a newspaper son" "does it get wifi?" "no, its just paper" "well that's retarded"                   WORK: teen seeks job "it says here u defeated the elite 4 on ur 1st try" yes sir "congrats, u got the job. ur starting salary is $1,000,000"                   TRUTH: cop teaches class on drug awareness "honestly guys... pot isn't bad for you" *class gives standing ovation* *cop starts breakdancing*                   DATING: teen breaks up with girlfriend "it's just not- *curls dumbbell* WORKING OUT for me" that's funny "i kno rite. but still we're thru"                   VIDEO GAMES: teen gets upset while playing Halo "why's this homo called master chef he never even cooks" "it's chief" "he's not even indian"                   UNDERCOVER: mysterious teen tries to disuade his peers "maybe we should wait until we're 21 to drink" *moustache falls off* "WTF DAD"                   TRUTH: cop teaches class on drug awareness "honestly guys... pot isn't bad for you" *class gives standing ovation* *cop starts breakdancing*                   STRUDEL'D: Teens get physical after toaster strudel incident "BRO DID YOU USE TWO PACKETS OF ICING" "yea?" "GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE"                   NO: teen in critical condition after asserting "digimon was way cooler than pokemon" "there's some things you just can't fucking say steve"                   ATTITUDE: teen fired from pizza joint for talking back over the phone "how much will a large pizza feed?" "one if ur a fuckin fatass"                   RAGER: dozens of teens flock to the local river after hearing reports that the water is "raging" "turn up!" *drowns in river*

FACES OF ATHEISM: REDDIT SUCKS

Teens nowadays are so culturally enriched.  Browsing reddit and understanding the universe is basically as synonymous with teenage years as smoking marijuana and riding longboards.  Let's take a look at six faces of the future generation that proudly represent the one true religion; atheism.





The master shit talker himself calling anyone who doesn't automatically accept his point of view "mindless sheep".  He doesn't even give a damn what you respond because he's got his headphones in probably blasting ANTI-MINDLESS SHEEP music.  Screw your archaic doctrines and your archaic style. 


At least this guy had the courtesy to capitalize "feminists".  Honestly I wouldn't give a damn either if I could grow a fashionable beard like this.  


If you're playing at home, this is the third fedora in this post.  This renaissance man is a musician, writer, gamer, tech geek, animator, and comedian EVEN BEFORE he has the chance to attend the world renown DeVry University.  You're honestly an idiot if you don't listen to what this intellectual and fashionable beast has to say.


I agree, I wouldn't have it any other way than this genius expanding the human genetic pool.  I doubt you can name one poor trait about this philosopher bestowed upon us by God himself known as David Rord.  Oh wait, not God, by the way, is fashion sense hereditary? [4 Fedoras]


If this guy doesn't put a smile on your face I guess you're just not enlightened yet...maybe it's time you guy to your local thrift shop, buy a fedora, and fucking learn how to fucking enjoy life.


If there is a God I can't imagine what he'd rather be doing than thinking about this man "ToastyMcAwesomeness" touching himself at night.