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BUDS: teens smoke marijuana "dude, could you imagine if weed was illegal?" "it is illegal" "WHAT??" *throws bong out window, flees country*                   POT: teen claims to be experiencing marijuana withdrawal "the room...it's so cold" bro u smoked for the first time yesterday "U DONT KNO ME"                   WONDERWALL: : teen learns guitar to pick up girls *strums a single G chord* "i'm gunna get so fucking laid"                   POOETRY: Teen fed up w/ eng class "do u love rap music? then class you'll love Edgar Allen Poe" "MORE LIKE EDGAR ALLEN POOP" "grow up steve"                   FADEAD: teens try drugs for the first time "dude i smoked like eleven beers" one teen claims "i drank like 2 weeds and drove" one teen dead                   BAD HAIR DAY: Teen girl decides to leave school after realizing her hair is "disgusting" an eyewitness stated "i'd still fuck her"                   BALLING: Teen takes girlfriend out to dinner "ight babe were gonna split the 60 pc nugget" "a milkshake? idk babe maybe next time"                   CIGS: teen takes up smoking to appear cooler to his peers "have you taken up smoking?" "yes, i have" "you appear cooler to me now"                   BUD: teen regrets getting high on marijuana before school "why are your eyes red?" "umm, i was riding my bike with the windows open" "what?"                   PUBERTY: 16 y/o feels confident with his newly grown facial hair "one packet of cigarettes please" no "okay!" *moonwalks out of 7/11*                   FLIRT: teens interact sexually "is that an iPhone in your pants or are you just happy to see me?" "it's a Samsung Galaxy you stupid bitch"                   SMACKED: teen nerd gets beat up by own father "sorry son, but you wore a naruto headband to dinner" "that shit just won't fly in my house"                   RAP GAME: teen claims to have "2nd degree murdered" the track after rhyming "zimmerman" with "swimmer tan" however a florida jury disagreed                   FAMILY DINNER: "mom what are we eating?" "we're having pasta" *mom puts on dubstep* "with a side of TURNIP" *everyone goes fucking nuts*                   FLIRT: teens interact sexually "is that an iPhone in your pants or are you just happy to see me?" "it's a Samsung Galaxy you stupid bitch"                   420: teens smoke after school "dude, do you ever think like, what if you were a chick? like what if- "WHAT IF YOU PASSED THE FUCKING BLUNT?"                   NOSTALGIA: HS sophomores reminisce about simpler times "remember the 90's?" "not at all"                   SMOOTH: teen uses a classic pickup line "you like marijuana?" ummm, yeah! "marijuwanna suck my dick?" *gets laid so hard*                   STYLE: teen wears new scarf to school "what's that bro? a cum rag?" "nah, it's a pussy eating bib" *walks into girl's locker room*

LEARNING TO SHAVE: LESSONS FROM PUBERTY

Local Florida 8th Grader rushed to Emergency Room after severely cutting his face while attempting to shave for the first time. Teen News correspondents were first on the scene.

 “it all happened so fast,” said Greg or as his friends call him ‘Gator’ “i heard that if you start shaving, your beard will grow faster” “chicks my age love beards”

The razor involved in the accident has been discovered to be a ‘Bic Twin Select’ or as they are more commonly known as ‘that shitty blue razor that your dad uses’
  

When asked if he had any regrets about the experience all ‘Gator’ has to say was, “chix dig scars, hashtag yolo” From all of us at teen news we wish this puberty pioneer a quick recovery.