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MAKING WUB: teen credits dubstep for his success with the ladies "you can't spell skrillex without killr sex"                   OH NO: nervous teen asks out girl "b-becky, do y-you w-wanna- *vomits everywhere* *slips on vomit* *penis lands directly in vagina* "swag"                   LIQUOR: teen girls celebrate wasted wednesday *shot #1* turn up! *shot #2* my bf is a totals dickk *shot #3* *pukes all over the floor*                   BADASS: teen smokes for first time "yeah i found this blunt in my moms ash tray" *lights cig* *coughs* "that good kush and alcohol son!"                   LANDLOCKED: Nebraska teens think about the beach "what do you think the ocean is like?" "it's probably hella gay" "i don't even like salt"                   ELECTED: teen wins over his high school in class elections "if elected... I WILL LEGALIZE MARIJUANA" *entire student body starts krumping*                   NO HOMO: local 6th grader claims he would "suck dick for some lunchables" He further stated that he doesn't know what "suck dick" means                   BAD HAIR DAY: Teen girl decides to leave school after realizing her hair is "disgusting" an eyewitness stated "i'd still fuck her"                   DIESEL: teen gets pulled over "officer, i know i was speeding i was just really mad" *officer lowers shades* "so you were FAST and FURIOUS?"                   BAD HAIR DAY: Teen girl decides to leave school after realizing her hair is "disgusting" an eyewitness stated "i'd still fuck her"                   TEEN TALK: "is the double condom method more effective?" "a condom inside a condom? that's like inception dude" "...more like CONTRACEPTION"                   PREP: teen frat star walks halls decked out in all Polo *sees black person wearing ecko* *hides* *whispers to himself* "help me mitt romney"                   FUN: college teens live it up "i thought tonight we'd go classy, so i bought the $18 vodka instead of the $12 one" "WE'LL DRINK LIKE KINGS"                   BAKED: teens get so high on marijuana they "forgot the alamo" "the what??" "DUDE WE WERE SUPPOSED TO REMEMBER THIS SHIT"                   TEEN TALK: "is the double condom method more effective?" "a condom inside a condom? that's like inception dude" "...more like CONTRACEPTION"                   BOSS: teen gets his homework checked "ya i didn't do it" "you don't have an excuse?" "EXCUSE me but how bout you get the FUCK outta my face"                   YOLO: HS teen takes it to the limit LET'S *turns hat sideways* FUCKING *puts speakers up to 80% full volume* DO THIS *drinks 2 light beers*                   FANDANGO: 16 year olds try to see an R rated movie "i left my ID in-" *fake moustache falls off* "damnit" *sees grown ups 2*                   DISSED: teen engages in a rap battle "dude ur raps are toilet/if i pooped in ur mouth you'd prolly enjoy it" *entire school krumps to death*

WEED STUDIES: DANK SCIENCE

A new study indicates that 3 out of 4 teenagers (approximately 69%) smoke marijuana. A follow up study was then administered where scientists conjecture that 1 in 4 teenagers happen to be nerds.
“we don’t think the results are simply coincidental”
*cool scientist rips a makeshift bong made from an Erlenmeyer flask*

colloquially referred to as "bongs", scientists prefer
to use their proper term, "water pipes"


Marijuana goes by a plethora of names: “the devil’s cabbage”, “Satan’s lettuce”, “Hitler’s broccoli”, and many more
“all the cool kids call it nug. but johnson over here calls it ‘the reefer’. what a friggin’ nerd!”
*cool scientist flips off johnson*

Scientists are also claiming the same genes that make people cool can also be found in the cannabis plant itself
“oh yeah this science shit is air tight”
*cool scientist pulls out indecipherable charts and figures*
“you see this shit? i know you aint tellin me you can prove that shit wrong… that’s what i thought. pussy”

the numbers don't lie folks


As marijuana use increases amongst the teenage population, scientists believe the cool kid to nerd ratio will also increase, and this leaves some scientists worried
“we saw the same shit happen in ‘09 when every kid was drinking 4loko. you can’t have that many cool kids runnin around. it throws off the natural order of things. next thing you know geeks like johnson are gunna start getting laid”
*cool scientist throws chemicals at johnson*

the drink that lost 1000 virginities

With all of this new information coming out linking marijuana smoking to teenage popularity, there is sure to be backlash in High Schools across the world. Some officials even suggest legalizing the drug as to make smoking it “less cool”
“wait a minute, this shit’s illegal?”
*cool scientist gives johnson a wedgie*
“HAHAHA I’M JUST FUCKIN WIT Y’ALL. 420 BLAZE IT FAGGIT”

On the contrary, some officials suggest putting more money into the War on Drugs

“it’s fine. spend another trillion dollars stopping potheads. we literally have infinity money” – Barack Obama

Whatever is done, teens are surely smoking weed at an alarmingly high rate, and this could potentially cause major world consequences in this country
“dude did you see that story about teens and marijuana on the news today?”
*teen passes blunt*
“the news?? what are you fuckin gay?”