THE GUCCI SYMBOL
This is a great unisex look. Shaving the gucci symbol into your pubic hair screams wealth, and rich people always get laid. Remember when Soulja boy got it tattooed on his forehead? Same effect, but way sexier. So next time you schedule that wax, keep in mind that bald is so last season, and shaving designer logos into your pubes, totes in. And as much as pubic hair is totally in, some pubic hair keep people TOTALLY OUT...
THE FEDORA
When choosing the shape of your pubes, make sure you do a lot of research. Studies show that 99.9999% of people that shave fedoras into their pubic hair stay virgins forever. But it doesn’t stop there... if you reference men’s sandals, unironic fanny packs, epipens or even Nickelback, you can never have sex again. So don’t ever underestimate the virginal power of any of the aforementioned.. you’ve been warned. You’re probably thinking, “I know what not to do... but how do I use this new found love for pubic hair to my advantage?” Well do we have the answer for you. The most effective pubic hair style to get laid involves time, hair dye, and two elastics. We call this one..
THE MILEY BUNS
If you let your pubes grow as long as you can, you should be able to put them into two little buns on either side of your pubic bone. This is a super cute, and easy way to maintain your wayward hairs. Next step is you have to dye the tips of your pubies platinum blond. But make sure to leave some roots! Ombre is super in right now. Now your cute pubes totally look like Miley! Omg now this is the best part. Your tongue automatically grows to TWO TIMES THE SIZE making oral pleasure SUPER good and effective for your partner. If word gets out that you have “Miley Buns” be prepared to have people fall all over you.
