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OBAMA CARES: teens have no idea "the government is gonna shut down!?" "yea something about a tea party" "wow politics is so gay"                   RADICAL: "hip dad" interacts with teenage children "sup kids? you guys feeling YOLO today?" dad no "this dinner sure is MAJOR SWAG" DAD WHY                   DIESEL: teen gets pulled over "officer, i know i was speeding i was just really mad" *officer lowers shades* "so you were FAST and FURIOUS?"                   OCTOBER: teens go on a haunted hayride *throws hay onto females* "HAY GIRL" *throws more hay* "i said...HAY GIRL" "hayyyy!" *gets laid*                   CIGS: teen takes up smoking to appear cooler to his peers "have you taken up smoking?" "yes, i have" "you appear cooler to me now"                   FLAMER: teen boy's house burns down due to his scented candle collection. Firefighters comment "it's the gayest tradegy i've seen in years"                   SCIENTIFIC: teen "experiments" with homosexuality *analyzes litmus paper* "just as i hypothesized.." *writes down data* "i'm gay"                   CENSORED: 10th grade teen refuses to say "the n word" during a class reading of To Kill A Mockingbird "there were black kids in that class"                   OUCH: Teen 'eats shit' while attempting to longboard to class "ive been practicing all summer!" "fuck i ripped my favorite plaid shorts"                   SWAGGER: teen gets ready for saturday night yeah this snapback yolo combo will for sure get me laid *chugs diet pepsi* TURN DOWN FOR WHAT?                   KOOLS: teen buys cigs to impress girls "can i get a pack of boges?" "what kind?" *lowers shades* "the kind that gives you the most cancer"                   ONLY 90s KIDS: teen tries new pickup lines "damn girl you give me goosebumps cause you are R.L. Fine af" "turn to page 69 if you wanna bang"                   BAZINGA: teen breaks up with girlfriend for complicated reasons "she liked the big bang theory" "i just couldn't respect her as a person"                   REBEL: teen makes breakfast for dinner "this is not an appropriate time for that!" FUCK SOCIETY *dropkicks mom* I'M MAKING FLAP JACKS                   KOOLS: teen buys cigs to impress girls "can i get a pack of boges?" "what kind?" *lowers shades* "the kind that gives you the most cancer"                   STUDY: teen crams for exam PREPARE THE LUBE MOTHER *jams textbook into anus* i guess you can say ill be pulling the answers...OUT OF MY ASS                   FASHION: as camouflage becomes more fashionable, teens become harder and harder to spot "shit where did Tim go?" "lol i'm right here dude!"                   LIFE CHANGING: teen has an epiphany while driving "what if... *slams on brakes* "WHAT IF THEY MADE DISPOSABLE SOCKS"                   COOL AF: teen isn't comfortable with temperature in his room A/C to 68° "too cold" A/C to 70° "too hot" A/C to 69° *uncontrollable laughter*

4 COMMON HOMEWORK EXCUSES

Teens hate doing homework and will say almost anything to get out of it.  The only problem is that sometimes the excuse is legitimate.  We interviewed a high school teacher to find out the four most common excuses for teens not doing their homework.  We also asked him whether or not these excuses were acceptable and the logic behind that decision making process.


4) "Sorry teach, apparently my brother is a werewolf and he ate my homework."


can teens ACTUALLY be where wools
What is your reaction to this excuse?
Professor Gulliville - "Most teens will use this excuse even when it isn't the day after a full moon.  I don't know if they think I'm an idiot, but come on everyone knows that.  Also, we ask our students to please submit any family history of lycanthropy or vampirism."
Acceptable or Unacceptable?
Professor Gulliville - "Unacceptable."

3) "I was a little busy barricading my house from zombies last night to do the math problems."


when zombs are nazis too smh
What is your reaction to this excuse?
Professor Gulliville - "My first reaction is to judge the seriousness of the child's expression.  If they are talking about a video game I will FAIL them immediately.  Video game playing turns kids into zombies!  If they look serious I have to understand that there is a very real chance of zombies rising up from the ground or a nasty virus turning us into zombie esque versions of ourselves that feast on the human race and some teens HAVE to look out for their families."
Acceptable or Unacceptable?
Professor Gulliville - "Acceptable sometimes."

2) "My printer is haunted."


print me somethin dude
What is your reaction to this excuse?
Professor Gulliville - "While ghosts are known to haunt inanimate objects sometimes, especially electronical objects, come on it's 2013.  Ghosts are known to be trend setters and would definitely inhabit an iPhone or a Samsung Galaxy before a friggin' printer!"
Acceptable or Unacceptable?
Professor Gulliville - "Completely Unacceptable."


1) "I forgot because aliens abducted me last night and erased my memory, obviously erasing the memory of the homework assignment wasn't their first priority but it was a consequence of the brain tampering procedure."
we come in peace lol
What is your reaction to this excuse?
Professor Gulliville - "The logic is very impressive.  Of course aliens would erase your memory after they abduct you to hide their existense.  I'm assuming his mom or significant other told him of his abduction and the rest was logically derrived."
Acceptable or Unacceptable?
Professor Gulliville - "Acceptable."