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PRUDE: teen admits he has never kissed a girl "dude how? you're 18" "cause i only kiss women...like YOUR MOM" "YOU GOT ME AGAIN BRO!" *bro5*                   ELECTED: teen wins over his high school in class elections "if elected... I WILL LEGALIZE MARIJUANA" *entire student body starts krumping*                   CENSORED: 10th grade teen refuses to say "the n word" during a class reading of To Kill A Mockingbird "there were black kids in that class"                   WHIP GAME: teens hit the go kart track "mushrooms and racing was a great idea" "i feel like mario" "haha steve is just staring at the wheel"                   PRUDE: teen admits he has never kissed a girl "dude how? you're 18" "cause i only kiss women...like YOUR MOM" "YOU GOT ME AGAIN BRO!" *bro5*                   DRUGSTEP: christian parents worried about teenage son "have you been smoking dubstep?" "mom what??" "DON'T LIE TO ME WHERE'S THE SKRILLEX"                   NEITHER: "which fedora should i wear?"                   WHY: teens can't understand their failures with women "i wore my best fedora!" did you show her ur beyblades? "no i forgot" rookie mistake                   BAD HAIR DAY: Teen girl decides to leave school after realizing her hair is "disgusting" an eyewitness stated "i'd still fuck her"                   TWITTER: teen faces crucial decision "i wanna rewrite my typo'd tweet but it already got three favs" "MY LIFE IS PAIN" *jumps off bridge*                   UNEMPLOYED: teen gets turned down at local super market for putting "rolls hella dope blunts" on his resume "how is that not a good skill??"                   ATTITUDE: teen fired from pizza joint for talking back over the phone "how much will a large pizza feed?" "one if ur a fuckin fatass"                   ROMANCE: teen learns the power of seduction "i have alcohol, weed, and an open house. wanna come over?" *gets laid to death*                   420: "son, can you look up how many grams are in an ounce?" "oh, it's 28" "why do you know that?" "because i love... the metric system" "oh"                   UNEMPLOYED: teen gets turned down at local super market for putting "rolls hella dope blunts" on his resume "how is that not a good skill??"                   SWAGGER: teen gets ready for saturday night yeah this snapback yolo combo will for sure get me laid *chugs diet pepsi* TURN DOWN FOR WHAT?                   PRUDE: teen admits he has never kissed a girl "dude how? you're 18" "cause i only kiss women...like YOUR MOM" "YOU GOT ME AGAIN BRO!" *bro5*                   NOSTALGIA: HS freshmen have a "remember the 90's" night "this is gunna be so rad!!" *they sit around and watch Max Keeble's Big Move (2001)*                   You can support the site by clicking an ad if it is relevant to your interests!

TEEN PROPOSES BAN ON SPAGHETTI EATING CONTESTS

In a remarkable twist of events, 16-year-old prodigy Ethan Anderson has taken the world of law and politics by storm with his outlandish proposal to ban spaghetti eating contests. In a press conference held at his high school cafeteria, Ethan passionately argued that these competitions posed a grave threat to public safety and were a cause for concern regarding the potential hazards of slurping noodles.

spaghetti eating

With a colorful slideshow and an eloquent speech, Ethan meticulously detailed the various dangers associated with spaghetti eating contests. His concerns ranged from the risks of choking to the potential for sauce-induced slippage resulting in catastrophic spills. He even cited statistics of an alarming increase in tomato sauce stains on teenage clothing, urging lawmakers to take immediate action.

Ethan's proposal, aptly named the "Pasta Peril Prevention Act," suggests a comprehensive ban on any organized events that involve competitive consumption of spaghetti. The act further specifies penalties for offenders, including mandatory pasta sensitivity training and community service at local Italian restaurants.

The announcement of Ethan's proposed legislation ignited a fierce debate within the teen community. Supporters argue that it's high time we prioritize safety over spaghetti consumption, while opponents claim that this measure infringes upon personal freedoms and undermines the spirit of gastronomic adventure.

Celebrities have also voiced their opinions on the matter. Renowned chef and TV personality, Chef Luigi, expressed his outrage, declaring that such a ban would "stifle culinary creativity and diminish the artistry of twirling pasta." On the other hand, health-conscious teen influencer, FitFreak17, hailed Ethan's initiative as a step towards encouraging healthier eating habits among teenagers.

The proposed ban has even gained international attention, with foreign dignitaries and pasta enthusiasts from around the globe expressing their disbelief and curiosity. Some countries, such as Italy, have offered to send their most skilled pasta eaters to demonstrate their impeccable technique, hoping to convince lawmakers that spaghetti consumption can be safe and enjoyable.

In response to the growing discourse, lawmakers have formed a special committee to evaluate the merits of Ethan's proposal. The committee will convene public hearings where experts, including professional eaters, nutritionists, and orthodontists, will present their views on the potential dangers of spaghetti eating contests.

While the outcome of this peculiar legislative battle remains uncertain, one thing is for sure: Ethan Anderson has become the face of teenage activism, inspiring a new wave of young individuals to challenge the status quo and advocate for their beliefs, no matter how peculiar or pasta-related they may be.

As the debate unfolds, we eagerly await the final verdict on whether spaghetti eating contests will become a thing of the past or if teens will continue to revel in the joyous chaos of noodle slurping competitions. Stay tuned as we keep you updated on the saucy twists and turns of this unlikely legal battle!