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NOSTALGIA: HS sophomores reminisce about simpler times "remember the 90's?" "not at all"                   OUCH: Teen 'eats shit' while attempting to longboard to class "ive been practicing all summer!" "fuck i ripped my favorite plaid shorts"                   ROMANCE: teen learns the power of seduction "i have alcohol, weed, and an open house. wanna come over?" *gets laid to death*                   GRADES: Student receives an "F" on powerpoint presentation for using too many laser sounds in transitions "that sound effect is gangster af"                   ROCK: 13 year old considers Creed to be "classic rock" "hey dad, let's spark a doobie and listen to creed" "son, just stop"                   OCTOBER: teens go on a haunted hayride *throws hay onto females* "HAY GIRL" *throws more hay* "i said...HAY GIRL" "hayyyy!" *gets laid*                   CHAT: teens talk on AIM™ Sk8rBoy - did she blow u? Dude86 - yea, but she sucked dick at it Sk8rBoy - is that good or bad? Dude86 - lmao dude                   HIGH: teens smoke while their parents are out "WAIT get the dog outta here. he'll tell my mom" *stares at dog for 30 seconds* "you're right"                   OLD: teen is highly confused "dad what's that?" "its called a newspaper son" "does it get wifi?" "no, its just paper" "well that's retarded"                   WOAH: teens get rowdy while driving "yo call that guy a fag and then drive off" "FAG!" "haha yes, we are so badass" *everyone high fives*                   NOSTALGIA: HS freshmen have a "remember the 90's" night "this is gunna be so rad!!" *they sit around and watch Max Keeble's Big Move (2001)*                   HOUSE RULES: a teen argues with his father "WEAR YOUR SNAPBACK SON" "dad why" "there are swagless kids in africa" "UGH YOU'RE TOO RAD DAD"                   BLAZED: pre-teens have their first sips of beer "when am i gonna get high?" "i've had like three. i.....i think i'm feelin it"                   WORK: teen seeks job "it says here u defeated the elite 4 on ur 1st try" yes sir "congrats, u got the job. ur starting salary is $1,000,000"                   NOSTALGIA: HS freshmen have a "remember the 90's" night "this is gunna be so rad!!" *they sit around and watch Max Keeble's Big Move (2001)*                   BUDS: teens smoke marijuana "dude, could you imagine if weed was illegal?" "it is illegal" "WHAT??" *throws bong out window, flees country*                   SIZZURP: Teens shocked after idol Lil Wayne goes into a codeine coma. "#PrayForWeezy" "if he dies we should def get school off"                   COLLEGE: teen takes Adderall to help his grades "i'm gunna crush this test yo" *next day* "wait, you have to STUDY also??" *fails hard*                   GAMECUBE: teens gear up for Super Smash Brothers Melee "i'm green falco" "i'm normal falco" "i'm red falco" "i'm ice climbers" "...fag"

5 WORST THINGS ABOUT GOING BACK TO SCHOOL


Such bullshit that bears can just hibernate through the winter. I wish I was a bear. Bitchiz love bears. Here are the 5 worst aspects of going back to school.

Not being able to watch porn with the volume cranked.


Unless BOTH your parents are teachers, it's likely that your parents work during your break. You are given the glorious privacy and freedom to jerk it. When school starts you only have a good hour to watch porn without anyone in the house, and that's only if only one of your parents work. Headphones are chill, but aren’t as epic and majestic as the sound of your porn echoing and hugging the acoustics of your house.

Patronizing textbook chapters.

The first chapter of any textbook induces crippling ADHD that makes me think about gnawing my ankles. I just read a chapter called Chapter 0. I can literally feel the teacher applying the lube on which anus she shall be fisting in two months.

Waking up before the sun rises.

During any break I behave like a savage. On New Year's Eve I ate fried chicken naked in my sheets with my girl. The sheets got mad greasy from so much meat, and yeah the chicken left a mess too (; The abrupt disturbance in your sleeping cycle is unhealthy. And then then a few months into the year, when you finally acclimate to a healthy sleeping habit, "they" TAKE AN HOUR. They just take it and you have to wake up an hour earlier than you have been for half of the year. You go to class before the sun rises and get out as it sets.

Unresolved Conflicts.

Most family's don't actually travel but still consider this break vacation because it is an escape from their lives. It's best to make any major decisions BEFORE going on vacation. Always breakup with your gf/bf before the holidays.

Seeing people.

Same people same shit. I only have 3 people I really consider to be my friend but hey, I'll take 4 quarters over 100 Pennies any day. Most people are just terrible.